I recently read an article online that asked a question: can a straight male and a straight female be JUST FRIENDS? People definitely have their thoughts on this. And of course, I have mine.
Since I’ve been little, I’ve always been more tomboy-ish and had more male friends than female friends. It’s just what I’ve been used to. I never gave it much thought until other people started to say things to me. My dad is one of these people.
My parents are divorced and one day he sat me down to give me some of his unique fatherly advice. We started talking and I mentioned how most of my friends are guys. He was telling me that a girl and a guy can never be just friends. One always wants something more than the other. And it’s usually the guy that wants to have sex with the girl. That’s it. Plain and simple. He kept going on and on telling me that he’s a man and he knows this. He told me that he would not be “friends” with a woman if he didn’t have intentions or thoughts of having sex with her eventually. Then he dragged my brother into the conversation for his input and my brother agreed, for the most part.
As a girl, I can be just friends with a guy. A sexual connection is not needed, nor is it wanted. It complicates things. I am ‘one of the guys’ with most of my guy friends. I burp louder than most of the guys I know. I like wearing just jeans, a t-shirt, and gym shoes. I’m not very fashionable. I’m not that into makeup, unless I go out somewhere. I listen to their crazy sexcapades and relationship problems… and that’s where I realized that could be a problem. As soon as you act like you care, which I actually DO care and want to help, then problems arise (no pun intended). After that they think you like them. If they weren’t attracted to you to begin with, now they might start looking at you another way. I mean, they might’ve already started to look at you different because they are comfortable around you anyway, but this makes things worse.
So what happens when you’re in a relationship? For example, as a girl, can your boyfriend have close friends that are girls? Would you be ok with that? Girls, like myself, say that they have normal guy friends. But, then they don’t like their boyfriends to be friends with other girls because deep down they know it’s true: guys just want to fuck. Or maybe the girl is just a hoe and has hoe-tendencies so you’re weary of her. There are a lot of different scenarios.
For the most part, I wouldn’t care if my guy has female friends. If I would be that worried about him cheating on me 24/7, I shouldn’t be in the relationship anyway. If a guy wants to cheat on you, he will do it regardless. This can go for females, too. If there is no trust, for a lack of better terms, then the relationship itself is fucked.
What about a guy’s perspective on this situation? Most of the guys I know would not be ok with their girls having male friends. Why? Because they have a dick themselves and know how it is (in my penis-less opinion).
So, do I think a guy and girl can be just friends and nothing else? I vote yes. There might be a few things hidden under the surface, but I think it’s possible. But then again, that’s just me. *shrug* What do you think?